J11 Ecosse – Lybster > Helmsdale

Ptit dèj agité avec Helen mon hôtesse airbnb, vraie pipelette. Tous les matins, elle dèj virtuellement par facetime avec sa best friend qui habite à Chypre : elle laisse le tel allumé et vaque à ses occupations pendant qu’on entend les paons du jardin de sa copine pousser des « Lééooonnnn ». Je coupe court – sinon j’y serais encore – et me mets en route avec un sublime soleil et sans vent ! Une journée idéale commence…non obstant mon mal de genoux qui s’accroît. La distance prévue étant très courte : 39km, je joue au touriste en m’arrêtant de partout. 1iere halte : un musée sur la vie des paysans des temps anciens qui en chiaient, 2ieme halte : un musée sur les vikings et sur un auteur – Neil Gunn – qui a bien traduit la nostalgie écossaise, 3ieme halte : la visite d’un village en ruine car les gens installés ici suite aux clearances (cf : Wikipedia), ont fui, la vie étant trop rude. De la joie et de la légèreté en barres quoi ! Je pique-nique au soleil avec une jolie vue : pain, tomates cerises du Maroc (pardon au Dieu de l’écologie), fromage de chèvre très goutu local (ça compense), tarte au citron triple couche fluo degueu et banane pas locale (ça decompense). J’arrive à Helmsdale mon port d’attache (car c’est encore en bord de mer), mignon port au passage. Je visite un dernier musée avec expo très contemporaine autour de la mémoire nucléaire du coin : il y a eu un gros centre d’expérimentation…nucléaire. Tour dans la salle des archives où je peux voir des photos de classe de la fin du XIXieme : étrange de voir ces enfants souriants morts depuis si longtemps. Pour retrouver de l’allant, allons prendre un café avec un scone au fromage : « coffee single shot or double ? ». Mon airbnb m’attend, j’ai 4 lits, dur de choisir lequel va recevoir mon auguste fessier puis dans la cuisine, je rencontre un écrivain qui conduit des étudiants américains de lieux en lieux pour sentir les Highlands. It’s time to eeeeaaaat ! Je me rends au « mirage » – non non, ce n’est pas un snack kebab comme à Marseille – pour déguster du poisson local : du haddock. Sur le menu, je lis « grilled » ou « battered », je me dis « chouette, grilled ça veut dire qu’il sera pas frit ou pané pour une fois ». Arrivent des filets de poisson panés avec des frites – ndlr : y a des frites partout, prochainement avec les desserts -. Je demande dans un anglais châtié : « Excuse me sir, could you explain me the difference between grilled et battered ? ». Il me dit que grilled c’est pané et battered c’est profondément frit…et pané. Bref : moment de découragement culinaire. Je ne prends pas le risque du dessert, je me rue au Spar en face – car j’ai toujours un besoin impérieux de finir par une note sucrée – , acheter un toffee pudding, ça sera peut-être pas meilleur mais j’en aurai pour mon argent : c’est que 90 pences ! Lesté par ce repas équilibré, je m’endors rêvant de loup grillé et petits legumes à peine croquants avec un soupçon d’huile d’olive…

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